Real programmers don’t believe in schedules. Planners make up schedules. Managers “firm up” schedules. Frightened coders strive to meet schedules. Real programmers ignore schedules.
Category: Programming
“I am not out to destroy Microsoft, that would be a completely unintended side effect.”
– Linus Torvalds
Real programmers don’t drive clapped-out Mavericks. They prefer BMWs, Lincolns or pick-up trucks with floor shifts. Fast motorcycles are highly regarded.
“In an information economy, the most valuable company assets drive themselves home every night. If they are not treated well, they do not return the next morning.”
– Peter Chang
Real programmers scorn floating point arithmetic. The decimal point was invented for pansy bedwetters who are unable to “think big.”
“It’s better to wait for a productive programmer to become available than it is to wait for the first available programmer to become productive.”
– Steve McConnell
Real programmers have no use for managers. Managers are a necessary evil. Managers are for dealing with personnel bozos, bean counters, senior planners and other mental defectives.
“I’m not one of those who think Bill Gates is the devil. I simply suspect that if Microsoft ever met up with the devil, it wouldn’t need an interpreter.”
– Nicholas Petreley
Real programmers don’t like the team programming concept. Unless, of course, they are the Chief Programmer.
“That’s what’s cool about working with computers. They don’t argue, they remember everything, and they don’t drink all your beer.”
– Paul Leary
One Furious Llama 