“Low-level programming is good for the programmer’s soul.”
– John Carmack
Tag Archive: Programming
You know I am an Amazon fan boy, right? You should, I wrote a million posts on it and you have to agree, I do have reason to be an Amazon fanboy. Amazon is made of win and so is the Kindle.
But now, now they have taken my ‘fanboy’ affection to a whole new level, a semi religious experience even. They are releasing a software development kit for the Kindle and are planning to roll out an ‘App’ store by the end of the year. It’s almost like an omniscient deity was listening to my wishes… almost.
Just the other day, whilst waiting and reading my Kindle (that I love and adore like a child) I thought, damn, it would be really cool if I could download some apps for it. Just a nice little note application. Or, and here is the thing, if I could get to my GMail from my Kindle, my life would, pretty much, be complete.
Sadly, I live in a country where the telecoms industry is run by a capitalist Gestapo that firmly believe in raping their subscribers in every possible way for every cent they have. So in this particular hell hole, Kindle does not have open internet access, making the GMail thing somewhat complicated.
Anyway, the reason I had my semi religious experience and am now giggling like a school girl is because I will be getting apps for my Kindle this year, and, even better, I will be able to write my own applications. I cannot, fucking, wait. So I’ve submitted my email address to the limited beta about a million times and if anybody from Amazon happen to read this, I may actually be willing to give you money to be part of said beta for the KDK.
Quick Kindle specs: 532Mhz CPU, 2Gb storage (mine anyway), 600 x 800 6″ grey scale screen (16 shades of grey), USB port, 3G/EDGE/GPRS connectivity, runs Linux-2.6.10.
The Kindle screen refresh rate doesn’t lend it’s self very well to action games or video so I expect the applications will probably be text oriented and the games will probably be puzzle type games. This is all good in my boo… Kindle.
If you want more, check out these links:
http://bit.ly/5f5zNU and http://bit.ly/7EXOF0 and http://bit.ly/8iZvHI
Overall, the fiber produced by a llama is very soft and is naturally lanolin free. Llamas are intelligent and can learn simple tasks after a few repetitions.
I was speaking to a friend of mine (OneFlew) on IRC today (yes, it’s still around, and yes, I still use it) about the Real Programmers that he worked with in his career as a programmer. He told me about Russel Hollick, who was then (and, still is, it seems), the Research and Development director of SYSPRO Africa.
In OneFlew’s opinion, Russell Hollick is a Real Programmer of note. Russell, at the time (and hopefully still) programmed in COBOL. Now the discerning reader may note that Real Programmers don’t program in COBOL. Generally, this would be true, but the legendary feats accomplished by Russell using COBOL are, apparently, manifold. I didn’t manage to get a lot of detail from OneFlew but he described Russell as “my god, a fucking genius”. Russell was apparently a vi master of the 8th degree, and single-handedly bent vi to his will. His will being programming Object COBOL in vi. Just using vi in the first place places the man somewhat higher up on the ladder of Real Programmers.
One of the feats that elevates Russell to the realm of Real Programmer is that he went and wrote a printer driver in COBOL. Now, the COBOL that was forced down my throat while studying is a bit hazy these days but from the little bit I can remember, the language wasn’t exactly meant for bare bones systems programming. This petty restriction does not deter the Real Programmer. Russell apparently also had a knack for calling the Windows API from COBOL and knew it inside out (most likely, he still knows it inside out today).
What sealed the deal for me was the fact that Russell had a cup of coffee permanently attached to his hand, a sure sign of Real Programmerness. Also a sure sign of one-handed typing skill I guess. He drove a red Porsche Carrera. Respect. Real Programmers like fast cars, fast bikes are highly regarded.
As I mentioned before, Russel was (and still is) the R&D Director of SYSPRO, code for “he wrote the fucking product with his bare hands”.
So here’s to Russell Hollick, Real Programmer.
Some llamas appear to bond more quickly to sheep or goats if they are introduced just prior to lambing.
“Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, while the Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is winning.”
– Rich Cook
While sitting this evening and trying to come up with something amusing to write about, it occurred to me that I would dearly like to write something reasonably interesting about Python, Django and programming. I’ve done posts about the combination before, right in the beginning when I was just coming to grips with MVC, Active Record and Django and was frustrated as all hell with Django’s really crappy error messages.
The problem, this evening, is that I realised that I am probably not good enough in Python to write anything really cool. Sure, I could write something about Python and Django, but what would be the point of that? I guess another ‘how to’ get past some of the more infuriating beginners problems would be useful to some people but it’s, well, not cool.
I could write some cool stuff about PHP because I know PHP and have written every conceivable type of script in PHP (web, daemons, sysadmin scripts, IRC clients even a script that uses WS-Security, once). PHP and I have been friends for a very long time and don’t get me wrong, I do still have very much affection for the language but it’s not what I’m ‘doing’ right now. I could also write something cool about Visual Basic, I have done some really neat things (in my biased opinion) in that language; at one point, everything I could think of. A particular favourite was a 3D rotation application with some interesting Z-sorting procedures but I digress.
The point is that I want to write about Python because that’s what I’m doing now and what I’m interested in, now, but I haven’t done any cool enough things with it yet, at least not anything I think is worthy of talking about and I am not yet confident enough with either to venture my opinion on how things should be done.
So basically, what I am pondering is, how long should it take to climb the hill of cognition (or some-such), working with a brand new programming language, before you know cool stuff. Four months is not enough for me but I’m already trying to think of something ridiculously cool (and, er, useful of course) to add to my current project, mostly for the sake of having done something, well, cool (and also, I do kind of enjoy learning somewhat).
The most apparent visual difference between llamas and camels is that camels have a hump or humps and llamas do not.
“It has been discovered that C++ provides a remarkable facility for concealing the trivial details of a program — such as where its bugs are.”
– David Keppel
“Manually managing blocks of memory in C is like juggling bars of soap in a prison shower: It’s all fun and games until you forget about one of them.”
– anonymous Usenet user
“Programming without an overall architecture or design in mind is like exploring a cave with only a flashlight: You don’t know where you’ve been, you don’t know where you’re going, and you don’t know quite where you are.”
– Danny Thorpe
“From a programmer’s point of view, the user is a peripheral that types when you issue a read request.”
– P. Williams
One Furious Llama 
Computer quote of the day 0×07
“If the code and the comments do not match, possibly both are incorrect.”
– Norm Schryer
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